Please Get Up Off Your Knee

… no not you sir, HER. Yes her, that desperate girl in front of you begging for your attention.

Ladies, PLEASE get up off your knees, praying for mister right to come along or begging some guy who doesn’t even deserve you to stay with you. You are worth so much more than that. Why are so many women so desperate and dependent on meeting their soul mate and meanwhile exciting opportunities are passing them by.

This post is probably going to sound like I have a big “F-YOU” on my forehead and a feminist megaphone in my hand when really my frustration is with the ladies out there.

Ladies… explain to me this…. when did finding a husband and getting married define who you are as a woman?

Now don’t start thinking I am saying getting married and starting a family in your 20 somethings is wrong – not at all. Some of my closest friends are married to wonderful men and have started their families. Mr. Right came a long (please note I did not say “they found Mr. Right”) nope no seeking and finding here…. their paths crossed and well they fell in love. I couldn’t be happier for them.

What gets me is when women are so desperate to get married and so set on that being their purpose in life that they don’t pursue college, they don’t invest in a career and instead they invest in…….the man hunt. Really?!? I don’t get it.

I have seen friends waste so much time and energy on “the hunt” and get nothing but heartbreak out of it. All because they don’t want to be alone on a Friday night. Well ladies I have found the secret to love…. ready…. GET A DOG. No hear me out. Bear is always happy when I come home, he gives me kisses even when I am grumpy and haven’t showered for the day, he cuddles, he always listens, he loves long walks with me, he lets me pick the movie…. I mean seriously…. I could go on. :)

The day I got Bear.

I don’t think I have ever really shared the story behind my getting Bear but long story short, I didn’t date until my senior year of high school and the first guy I ever dated I shared a 4 year-long distance relationship. He was my first kiss, my first love… I thought I would marry him…. summer before my senior year of college, he broke up with me and starting seeing another girl days later… coincidence I think not…. and instead of moping, eating tons of ice cream and watching chick flicks I decided I was going to finally get the dog I had been wanting for a long time. I went to the humane society when they were having a puppy sale and what do you know… there was Bear…love at first sight.

Getting Bear was almost a way to prove to myself that I can do whatever I want and I don’t NEED a man to do it with. Sure I believe having someone you love to share things with could make them more fun but you don’t NEED one.

Ok so maybe getting a dog isn’t the secret to love and maybe I am not the right person to be giving advice seeing as though I am single but I do know this…I am single but I am a very happy single. I am a very happy person.

I like to think of singleness as a compliment sometimes. No seriously….I had a buyer (reminder I am in real estate) once tell me that I was “too fast paced and intimidating,” he said guys were scared of me because I obviously knew what I wanted and wasn’t letting anyone get in my way. When I first heard this I was slightly annoyed and slightly self cautious thinking there was something wrong with me for being so motivated. I have since had time to think about this and have realized… nope I am not the one with the problem. If I have ever made a guy feel like he couldn’t ask me out because I am too motivated, well then he isn’t the guy for me…(no offense but some guys need to grow a pair and stinking ask a girl out). I have said for a while and I think it is probably true that if I guy were ever interested in me he would have to shake me by the shoulders and tell me he likes me because I am just so not worried about dating right now and love all of the wonderful friendships I am creating with people.

Here is one of my theories on strong, wonderful women… there aren’t enough men like us to go around…that or the guys we are supposed to be with aren’t done “maturing yet” (sorry guys yes that was another dig at you) or personally I just believe I am going to have some crazy story someday of how I met the love of my life and in that moment I am going to be so thankful I didn’t waste my time before I met him searching for him when our paths weren’t meant to cross yet.

SO STOP. Please stop crying over the jerk who wasted your time, begging your ex boyfriend to give your relationship “one more chance”, stalking people on Facebook to figure out if your personalities are compatible.

Enjoy your life. Pursue YOUR dreams. Travel the world without having to worry about someone else’s schedule. Buy that pair of shoes you want because you are the only one balancing your checkbook. I know I am.

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